Introducing...

My daughter,
My mini-me,

The apple of her daddy's eye,

Our little baby girl.

Her name is...

Elena Grace Collins

The Story

When it comes to baby names, I am not one to share "my list." You know; the running list of potential baby names that every girl starts when she's in middle school. I've had this list both in my head and written down for years, but it's not something I discuss openly. Here's why: first, I don't want your opinion (unless, of course, you agree with me), and second, I don't want you to get pregnant and steal my baby name. And if you think that second part never happens, then you're very, very wrong. A woman hears a name she likes (from her best friend, no doubt), gets knocked up and then embroiders that name on every burp cloth and baby blanket she owns. Her unmarried, unpreggo best friend is left dumb-founded because she gave her the baby name idea to begin with. You know, the name she had reserved for her future bambino. Ouch. That's gotta hurt. So, yea, you can call me crazy, but my baby names have been top secret information for years (and this is coming from someone who cannot easily keep a secret).

Since Jonathan and I have been together for -oh- our entire lives, he has had the privilege of seeing my baby name list. Some names he liked. Some he vetoed. And some he loathed. He swears that "Jocelyn" was my #1 choice when we were freshmen in high school. He thinks it had something to do with my "Leonardo DiCaprio phase" (whatever that means). Clearly, I have no recollection of this.

Jonathan and I chose the name "Elena" a few years ago (long before we were even thinking about having a baby). Our go-to girl name has been "Elena Claire" ever since. We both loved everything about it. Not too common. Not too unheard of. And y'all know I love the alliteration of "Claire Collins." Such a great ring to it.

Obviously, "Claire" didn't make the final cut for our daughter's middle name. Don't get me wrong; we still love the name "Claire." But "Grace" ultimately felt like a better fit. Baby Girl will have one aunt (Jonathan's sister), and her name is Grace. If our daughter is anything like her aunt Grace, she'll be funny, cool and gorgeous. So, "Grace" became our new go-to middle name.

Meanwhile, "Elena" was nearly scratched off the list too.

See, during the big "It's a Girl!" ultrasound in December, I looked over at Jonathan all teary-eyed, and said "I guess this makes the baby name easier!" (We had two potential boy names and one girl name.)

About an hour later, as we were waiting for the doctor to come in, Jonathan said "What were the other baby girl names on the list?"

Really?

Other names?

"There aren't any other names on the list," I said. "You vetoed all of the other options during our senior year of high school."

So, for weeks, we've been contemplating, debating and Googling; all in an attempt to give our first born child a name we both love.

"No one has a good reaction to the name Elena," Jonathan said one night after the baby name discussion came up for the fifth time that day.

"That's OK with me," I responded. "Mostly because I don't care what anyone else thinks. And I am not naming our baby by committee. This is our child. And we get to name her something we love."

Then, a few days ago, Jonathan started referring to my belly as "Elena Bear" or "Baby Elena."

Looks like this one is gonna stick after all. And it's a good thing, because I love her name. Even though I don't know her yet, I feel like her name already suits her personality.

The Stats

Elena 

• Pronunciation: (eh LAY nah)
• Origin: Greek
• Meaning: "Light" or "bright one"
• Form of Elanor, also considered a Spanish and Italian form of Helen
• Currently ranked #195 in U.S. births, but is a very popular name in Spain and Russia

Grace

• Pronunciation: (gras)
• Origin: Latin
• Meaning: "Grace of God"
• To Christians, grace means free salvation from God. In Greek mythology, the three Graces were goddesses of charm, beauty, fertility, nature and creativity.
• Currently ranked #17 in U.S. births

Love her name? Please, do tell (I like comments!). Hate her name? Please, keep your opinion to yourself. =)

Bump Watch: 24 Weeks

I think I look pretty huge in this picture. It must be the white shirt. Don't worry; I wore a cardigan with it to "tone down the tummy."

Pregnancy Highlights: I love being pregnant more than being not pregnant! Is that weird? Of course, I reserve the right to retract this statement as my pregnancy progresses.

How Far Along: 24 weeks

Size of baby: Papaya baby!

Total Weight Gained/Lost: 10 pounds gained, I think. The scale keeps going back and forth between 9 and 10. So, we'll go with 10 (just seems more realistic).

Maternity Clothes: This may fall under the category of TMI, but Mama Collins is going to have to invest in a new bra. The girls are getting a little large and in charge. Sorry, male readers (i.e. Dad).

Gender: Sweet little girl!
Movement: Little Miss C. is still moving around a lot. She is very active when I am driving to and from work. My grandmother said "maybe she's carsick!" I hope not! My mom and I both get horrible motion sickness. I hope my little lady doesn't inherit it!
Sleep: Sleeping terribly this week! I cannot get comfortable, so I toss and turn all night.

What I miss: My filter. My family and close friends would argue that I never had an internal filter to begin with, but my tendency to blurt out my opinions is now worse than ever. I'm trying my best to take it down a notch. But let's face it; I have a lot of opinions, and I like to talk. This can be quite a self-destructive combination.

Cravings: Someone mentioned Krystal burger the other day, and now I can't shake the craving. I think I'll indulge soon!

Aversions: Jonathan made the mistake of mentioning barbecue the other night. I gagged at the thought of it. Ew!
Symptoms: Swollen feet! My mom came to visit last weekend, and we ran around town all day long (literally from sunrise to sunset). When we finally got back to my house, I changed into my comfy PJs, and that's when I realized my little feet had transformed into giant balloons. Yikes! I had the deepest sock indentions on my ankles. Good thing my mom was there... she gave me a foot massage! Unfortunately, the ankle swelling continued throughout the work week too, causing my feet to ache at night. (And, yes, I have considered that it may be a sign of preclampsia, but when I was at the doctor last week, my blood pressure was excellent.)
Best Moment this week: Jonathan and I saw her move for the first time this week!  Sometimes I sit in bed and just stare at my bare belly (hoping to see her wiggle under my skin), and she finally did! It was so cool! I know that when she gets bigger all of her movements will likely be painful, but for now I am loving every punch and kick!

Beyond Blessed

When Jonathan and I made the decision to start a family, we had no idea it would happen so quickly. 

Being the worrier that I am, I expected the worst. I thought it would take months and months of "trying" before we would conceive. Lucky for us, it didn't. Once I knew I was pregnant, I was terrified to share the news with anyone, because I was afraid I would have a miscarriage. I thank God I didn't. I thought for sure I would have terrible morning sickness and all the other worst possible first trimester symptoms. But I didn't. Well into my second trimester now, I still feel great. Very lucky. And very, very blessed. 

I know a lot of people who have not had an easy road though. And it isn't fair. At all. 

I have friends who have experienced infertility issues and miscarriages, and while some of them eventually got pregnant and welcomed a child into the world, some of these friends are still waiting (hoping, praying) for their chance to experience pregnancy and parenthood. 

I pray for these friends often. Not because they asked me to. Not because it's the right thing to do. I pray for them because my heart calls me to do it. I guess there's something to be said about the power of prayer (and this is coming from someone who never prayed regularly until recently).

I didn't make a New Year's resolution. Remember? I did, however, promise to count my blessings this year. And I am. Everyday, I do my best to acknowledge the positivity in my life. Carrying a baby and experiencing the anticipation of becoming a mother is by far the best thing that has happened in my short little life. Some days are certainly better than others, but I know I am beyond blessed, and I never, ever want to take it for granted. And while I continue to be grateful for the blessings in my own life, I can't help but ask the man upstairs to pay it forward and grant the happiness I feel to other women who deserve it much more than me.

Hospital Tour

"I don't want to do this part." 

That's what I said last night as Jonathan and I walked down a long hospital corridor with a dozen other parents-to-be. That's right, friends; we toured the hospital where Little Miss C. will make her world debut. 

And, I must say, the experience certainly made this whole "We're having a baby!" thing feel very, very real. 

Jonathan said I looked a little freaked out and teary-eyed (especially at first). Which is probably true, because I am freaked out. I am teary-eyed. Come on, man - the thought of having a baby is scary! 

I don't want to go into labor. I don't want an IV. I don't want an epidural. I don't want to push. I don't want to sweat. I don't want to cry, scream and curse at my poor husband. I sure as hell don't want an episiotomy (Unfamiliar? Google it!). And I don't want a c-section. I just don't wannnnna!!!

(Like, seriously, where is the stork when a girl really, really needs him?)

OK, OK. Enough with the whining. 

Since I do want to meet my daughter someday, I guess I'm going to have to suck it up and deal. After all, I got myself into this -ahem- delicate condition. So, it's up to me to push my anxiety aside, push through pain (pun intended) and have a baby.

Panic attack aside, the hospital tour was ultimately a good thing. We got to see the family waiting areas, the birthing suites, the nursery and (perhaps most importantly) where to park our vehicle when the big "get me to the hospital stat 'cause this baby is coming!"day arrives. After the tour, Jonathan and I were both smiling ear-to-ear, and we couldn't stop grinning once we were home. I know I've said it a million times (and I do sincerely apologize for my inability to talk or write about anything unrelated to the baby), but we are just so, so, so excited!

Bump Watch: 23 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights: Everything! I love being pregnant! (I am starting to freak out a little bit, though, about actually having the baby.)

How Far Along: 23 weeks

Size of baby: Mango baby! 

Total Weight Gained/Lost: 9 pounds gained. Not too bad, I guess. Some days I feel like a fatty. And some days I don't.

Maternity Clothes: Now that I look mega-preggo, I am beginning to feel sort of cute in maternity styles. I bought a new pair of jeans this week and a couple of new spring-inspired shirts. Can't wait to wear my new clothes!

Gender: It's a GIRL! And, she has a NAME! (I promise to share details soon.)
Movement: Squirm, squish, punch, kick. Little Miss is still moving around quite a bit. She's sleeping a lot too, though. And I can definitely tell when she's sleeping and when she's awake!
Sleep: The weird dreams continue. One night, I dreamed that Jonathan and I were serial killers, and we stashed a lot of bodies in a house in the mountains. A neighbor discovered what we were doing, and came to tell us that he was going to turn us in to the authorities. In my dream (I kid you not), I said "Well, you do what you have to do, but if we go to prison our child won't have any parents."
Whoa.

What I miss: I still miss my brain. Apparently, I may never have a fully functioning brain ever again. I've been told that "pregnancy brain" progresses to "mommy brain." So, don't ask me any hard questions for the rest of my life.

Cravings: Cereal. Especially fruity stuff like fruity Cheerios or Trix.

Aversions: Work.
Seriously. I have very little motivation to get out of bed and go to work everyday. Once at the office, I have very little motivation to do anything productive. This is bad news bears, because I know it will only get worse as baby girl's due date gets closer.
Symptoms: Backaches! I desperately need a massage.
Best Moment this week: Having a lunch date with my baby's daddy and talking all about our Little Miss (what she'll look like, her personality, how much we love her already). We're both getting more and more excited to meet her!

Missing: Coat Closet

Who builds a house without a coat closet? I'll tell ya who. Apparently, the folks who built our humble abode.

My mister bought our house back in 2005 (way before I moved in and became his Mrs.). Of course, I saw the place before he signed his name on the mortgage papers, and I loved it! It was brand-spankin' new. New walls, new floors, new appliances, new smell, new everything. Pretty perfect place for a guy fresh outta college with his first big boy job.

But, as we all know, it isn't until you live in a new house that you discover its flaws. The contractors paint isn't scrubable and begins to look dreary. You learn that the guys who installed the floors probably weren't very smart. Same goes for the guys who installed the heating/air and electrical work. Tiles crack, windows break, toilets run, stuff leaks, and the new smell eventually wears off.

These things are to be expected. But what you don't expect: missing storage that is crucial to everyday living (i.e. a coat closet). It's like a kitchen without cabinets or a bedroom without a closet. OK, maybe a coat closet isn't that necessary. But I want one, dang it.

While enduring my first winter in Nashville back in 2008, it dawned on me; our perfect little house doesn't have a friggin' coat closet. And our stupid coats were scattered all over the place. The stair rail, the backs of dining room chairs, the couch, our bed, wherever. As one who lives by the "everything should have its place" principle, this missing coat closet quickly became quite a nuisance.

Of course, I also live by the "it can wait until tomorrow" principle, so I didn't do anything about it. Until now, of course.

I'm on a mission to create a make-shift coat closet in our casa. The project is underway, and so far it looks pretty darn cute. Just a few more things to complete, and it will be perfect.

In the meantime, here are some entryway/coat closet solutions that inspired this project:

The expensive options:

Oh, Pottery Barn; your stuff looks pretty in pictures, but it's all way too expensive!

The not-so expensive (i.e. way more awesome) options:

Holly's cute laundry room/entryway at Life in the Fun Lane

Katie's DIY entryway over at Bower Power

Petersik fam's solution over at Young House Love 

I know you're just dying to see what I come up with for my house. More to come... promise.

Bump Watch: 22 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights: Everything!

How Far Along: 22 weeks

Size of baby: Spaghetti squash baby! Baby C. is pushing one pound this week, which means she has doubled in size since the gender-revealing ultrasound just a few weeks ago (when she weighed in at 8 ounces).

Total Weight Gained/Lost: No more worries! Mama Collins is on the weight gain train. Since baby girl is growing rapidly these days, I am too; 8 pounds gained (eek!).

Maternity Clothes: Still loving my maternity pants and dresses. I may need to purchase a couple of shirts soon. I literally wear the same outfits to work week after week after week.

Gender: It's a GIRL!
Movement: Baby Collins is squirming around all over the place these days, and I absolutely love it! I could sit around with my hand on my tummy for hours. It's the best entertainment. Even when she wakes me up in the middle of the night with her kicks and punches, I can't help but smile. Carrying a baby is such a blessing; I will not take a single moment for granted!
Sleep: Sleeping fine. Not great. Not terrible. But just fine.

What I miss: The ability to use my brain. Seriously, pregnancy brain is a real problem. I always thought it was an excuse to be flaky, forgetful, lazy, whatever. But it's no joke! I am mega-dumb lately. And it's not on purpose.

Cravings: Nothing specific this week.

Aversions: Nothing, really. I am an equal opportunity eater.
Symptoms: I look pregnant. Is that a symptom?
Best Moment this week: The look on Jonathan's face when he felt his baby girl kick for the first time (Saturday, January 8). He looked like a little kid on Christmas morning. I have a feeling our sweet girl is going to have her daddy wrapped around her little finger! 

Little Miss C's Pretty Pink Nursery: Part 1 (of, like, 500)

Remember when I said I didn't want an all-pink nursery for a girl? And, then, remember when I changed my mind? Yea, Little Miss C. is going to have quite the nursery, folks. It will be quite girlie. And quite pink.

Not too pink though. I'm going for an understated, sophisticated look (you know, because clearly my daughter will be verrry sophisticated). No bright pink. No hot pink. Nothing too overwhelming to the eye.

But pink is pink, after all. And it's just an in-your-face kind of color. So, what can you do to make pink a little less so? Pair it with soft, subtle gray, of course.

And, that's how I fell in love with pink.

Here's a little taste of Baby Girl's nursery-to-be...

In the words of my girl, Candice O., "how divine."

Home Office

Oh the weather outside is frightful...

 But working from home is sooo delightful!

Before I went to bed last night, I begged the good Lord for enough snow to keep me locked up in the house all day today. Looks like I got my wish! Woot!

Top five reasons I'd rather work from home than go to the office:

 

1. It's Monday, and I am tired. The husband and me worked our tails off all weekend (nesting and such). I don't think my body could handle high heels today.

 

2. No dress code! While I do love my newly hemmed maternity pants, it's nice to sit around in jeans and tennis shoes all day.

3. No distractions! You know; scheduled meetings, impromptu hallway meetings, incoming project requests. When you're out of sight, you're kind of out of mind. It's nice to be out of sight for the day.

 

4. Multi-tasking! If I need to throw in a load of laundry while simultaneously working on a press release, it's totally do-able.

5. No eyeliner! Or mascara! Don't get me wrong, I love my eye makeup. But the older I get, the more annoying it is to paint myself up everyday. 

Happy Snow Day, Friends! I hope it's frigid where you are too!

Peace Out, VY

Anyone else sad to see Vince Young get booted by the Titans? No? I figured it was just me. 

It's not because I think he's a great quarterback (clearly, he's no Peyton). And it's not because I think he's hot ('cause he's no Eli). It's because we were totally friends. Yea, I'm pretty connected. I am friends with a lot of famous people (only in my sick, twisted mind, really).

See, VY and me, we fist-bumped once.  Actually, I tried to shake his hand and he went in for the fist bump. Awkward, I know. But it kind of felt like insta-friendship.

See...

At the 2009 VY4Kids Golf Tournament (clearly, a work-related thing). WHY do I look so dang excited? How embarrassing.

Anyway, I guess I have to say "peace out" to my ol' pal, VY. Too bad. So sad.

Bump Watch: 21 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights: I really feel like I am walkin' on sunshine!!! Pregnancy is being very good to me (thank you, Lord!). My friend Kelly said it must be a sign from God that Jonathan and I are meant to have lots of babies. Sounds great to me! But we'll take on this parenting thing on one kid at a time.

How Far Along: 21 weeks

Size of baby: Carrot Baby! (I think this only applies to length of our little lady.)

Total Weight Gained/Lost: Believe it or not, I am "stuck" at six pounds gained. I thought I would gain at least a few pounds during the holidays; but nothing! (I promise I am not bragging. I've actually been a little concerned about the lack of weight gained, and I plan to ask my doctor about it at my next appointment.)

Maternity Clothes: My sweet grandmother hemmed my work pants for me (featured in this week's bump picture). Hooray! 

Gender: It's a GIRL!
Movement: I felt the first official kick on Tuesday, January 4. I had just finished my household chores for the night and laid down to watch TV for a few minutes before bed. My hand was on my belly, and that's when I felt a big punch or kick right in the gut. It was undoubtedly her! And it was the best feeling!
Sleep: I recently read that it's best to sleep on your left side when pregnant. Now, every single time I wake up throughout the night I am inevitably sleeping on the "wrong" side -or worse- on my back. There are way too many pregnancy "rules." It's a little overwhelming.

What I miss: Being able to move bags, boxes and furniture without a second thought. The nesting stage has officially begun, but I am having a hard time shifting stuff around on my own. Good thing I have such a helpful husband! He has already unloaded a million unused and unwanted items from our house!

Cravings: FOOD! I cannot get enough to eat. I think Baby Collins is hitting a growth spurt 'cause Mama Collins is hungry!

Aversions: Nothing is grossing me out right now. Probably because I want to eat all the time.
Symptoms: Hunger, a kickboxing baby and nesting. Looks like this "I'm having a baby" thing is the real deal. Whoa. I am nervous!
Best Moment this week: Making lots of big decisions and feeling really confident about our choices. Searching for (and finding) furniture for Baby Collins' nursery, choosing a color palette, picking out her bedding. We're making major progress on the to-do list, and I love it!

Oh, the Flossy, Flossy

Since confirming that Baby Collins is indeed a precious little angel-faced girl, Mama Collins has been dreaming of all things pink, sparkly, fluffy and glamorous. Yes, glamorous. You know, G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S. In the words of Fergie Ferg: oh, the flossy, flossy.

After scouring the internet and collecting dozens of inspiring design photos, I now have a pretty clear vision for Little Lady's uber-girlie (yet understated) nursery. And -let me just tell you- it will be nothing short of fabulous.

What does Papa-Bear Collins have to say about this all-out pink, puffy, powdery, girlie girl nursery? I think he's totally digging the idea. In fact, he did a little daddy-to-be shopping while I was at work Monday, and when I came home this was in the garage:

BLING!

Oh, and I know I specifically said "no pink." But guess what? I changed my mind.

Misplaced Motivation

Isn't a new year/new start supposed to renew and revive all aspects of our lives? If so, then I totally misplaced all of my motivation to get anything done at work. I'm just not feelin' it, y'all!

Don't get me wrong; I like my job. Yes, I'm one of those weirdos who (on most days) really enjoys the grind (emphasis on most days, people). Granted, if someone gave me a trillion bones and said I never had to work again, I'd certainly take them up on the offer. But for a girl who's gotta earn a salary, my job ain't too shabby.

After being out of the office for 1o consecutive days, I dragged myself out of bed this morning and reluctantly returned to work. I returned to my to-do list, a million e-mails, a bunch of meetings and the not-so-sweet sound of construction outside my office window. And while I should be eager to tackle all the projects on my plate, I am busy day-dreaming about baby names, doctor appointments, nursery furniture and paint colors.

Sigh...

Maybe I just need a day or two to get back in the swing of things.

A Fond Farewell and a Brand New Year

Can you believe it's 2011 already? I can't. 2010 was action-packed; fun with family and friends, vacations, celebrations. It went by so, so fast, and I kind of miss it already. 

Overall, 2010 was a good year for my little family. We experienced some very difficult trials though; particularly the sudden death of my sweet grandfather, who I still miss so very much. But I think (for me, at least) it was the sharp pain of that loss that gave me the courage to stop putting my dreams on hold. Suddenly, I knew that nothing else mattered in this life. Unexpected, devastating loss isn't an unfamiliar feeling for me, but this time -at this particular crossroad in my life- the "there's no time like the present" lesson hit me in an unfamiliar way. I became acutely aware of my desire to start a family with my husband, become a mother and experience the blessings only a child can bring. This dream couldn't wait another day.

As 2011 begins, I feel like the luckiest woman in the world. I have a husband who loves me, despite my many, many flaws. I have an amazing circle of family and friends, who bring happiness into my life daily. I have the sweetest puppy dog in the whole world, who is always excited to see me and always happy to snuggle with his mama. And, in a few short months I will meet my daughter.

Doesn't get much better.

Forget goals, resolutions and to-do lists. The only thing I plan to count, track or tally in 2011 are the many blessings God has given me. I am a lucky lady, indeed.

Happy New Year, Friends! I hope 2011 brings many blessings to you and your family!